Endometriosis and Me: A Relationship Timeline - Part One
The Day We Met
It was my first year of middle school, sometime in the fall if I remember correctly. I got my first ever period, thank goodness I was wearing black jeans.
Things went as they usually go, an experience I’m sure every girl can recall. My mom drove me to Target to get some pads, and I officially became a woman.
The Start
The issues started pretty quickly. Cramps, migraines, bloating, nausea, the works. These are issues most women deal with, but many women suffer to an extreme without being aware that their pain is worse than others. I was one of these women.
When I would miss school because of my cramps, I couldn’t understand how my friends were able to handle the pain better than me. I blamed it on myself, and saw myself as fragile. The truth was that my pain actually was worse than my friends, although there was no real way for me to notice.
Once I started missing multiple days of school a month, my mom had had enough. She took me to a gynocologist to figure out what was going on, and what we could do to help.
A New Bombshell Enters The Villa
Birth Control. I can’t even tell you how many versions of birth control I was put on, but I can share with you some moments I remember of this journey.
First off, I was horrified to start birth control. As someone who had attended church every Sunday and then youth group the following Monday, I instantly thought I would go to hell if I went on birth control. Which is crazy right? It’s not like I was sexually active, I wasn’t using the pill to keep babies away, I was using the pill for my own health. Yet, due to my view within the church (and some undiagnosed OCD and anxiety at the time) I really thought I would go to hell if I took it.
My mom, also a part of the church, understood my worries but assured me this was not the case. She even took the time to pull up articles to show me proof when my worrying continued. So yeah, that was one pretty big hill to get over.
Then came the countless trials. We started with a pill, which would help one symptom then make another one worse. This cycle continued through multiple different types of birth control.
Then my gyno suggested I try Nexplanon. Yup, the plastic stick they shoot up in your arm (which also can get lost?? WHAT??).
At this point I was desperate to find a life with some sort of relief, so I let them put that plastic stick in my arm. The sensation of it going in was such a weird feeling, and one I hope I never have replicated. Also, the way I could feel the stick at my arm…I’m cringing at the thought.
Fun Fact: If you look closely on my left arm, you can still see the scar from where they put it in!
Nexplanon became my breaking point with birth control. Within only four months I gained at least 10-15 pounds, which was not normal. Before I went on Nexplanon, I asked my gyno to tell me all of the symptoms, because I had previously had so many issues with birth control in the past. Not once did she mention weight gain. Could I have Googled this? Yes. Did I trust my doctor? Also yes.
We had gone to Disney for vacation and I genuinely thought I gained all that weight because of it. I will admit, it could have played a part in it, but 10-15 pounds? Yeah, no.
I got the Nexplanon stick taken out of me as soon as I realized how much weight I had gained. Despite this, I was never able to get back to the body I had before, which has caused me many body and ED related issues that still affect me today.
At this moment, my trust with my gyno had been broken, and I went off birth control completely. This meant dealing with almost unbearable pain, but to me it was better than the alternative with birth control.
